... may everyday feel like a Holiday...

Holiday – such a lovely word… A word that creates an entire series in your head, of things you will do, see and experience. From sleeping in the finest sheets Belgium can offer to feeling every grain of sand on the sunset beaches of Algarve. The term holiday doesn’t give credit to the feeling it stirs within every individual – each different but equally desired. A holiday is kind of like Spring Love that rejuvenates and gives new meaning to an otherwise dreary morning. It puts a warm smile that was trapped beneath the icy reality you carried on your face. Holidays are not just about going to places and enjoying the 'new' sights and sounds – but anything that you have wanted so much to do but couldn’t because of all the routine elements of your life. So your holiday just might be taking a few days off work with late mornings and afternoons spent in the maze of a library and finished off with a midnight cup of coffee in front of a crackling fireplace. Even while thinking of taking a holiday, your mind has already broken free of the shackles of the ordinary. Even as you’re taking the same route, you hear the sound of your shoes on the cobbled streets – a sweet and unfamiliar sound that is more melodious than the greatest symphonies of all time. While booking tickets you are already smiling thinking of the trance the Spanish guitar will take you into. On your way to the station or airport you’re already licking your lips at the thought of the heavy cream that is generously smothered on your pastry, which you will order in a couple of hours. You’ve already thought of souvenirs you will buy at a store or keep the local station ticket stub as one. It’s strangely drawing you into this wonderful world of dreams and possibilities that may change your life or just bring out the smile that’s been patiently waiting to break out…     

     

March 3rd, 2011 - Untitled

At the risk of being accused of using this space as a frustration outlet, I dare to proceed............... The dreamers always get the short end of the deal...... for no fault of their on - except that they were born that way...... how far can you blame it on them - 'Hey you were born practical and realistic, being able to assess what is plausible and not - Not everyone is born like that'........ What do the Dreamers do? Well... very simply put - they dream...... and it seems like in the surreal space where they saw it happen - anything is possible........ and everything is possible........... we build structures.....we grow with nature......... we give birth to an escapists dream destination.....

                     But then we come crashing back...... with the sound of an all too realistic and pragmatic clock, the unsympathetic and careless hands of friend or mother and sometimes awoken after the inebriated stupor of your surreal state wears off...... sigh.... thats the worst of them all......... Its almost like you can't take it anymore and you voluntarily walk into the world....... I don't know anymore - theres a clear distinction and no space for one in the other dimension..... Now what do we do about that....... When we sift through parallel existences and find that we have problems with both....... If we find two insatiable, How will we be at peace with one?

"Relative"

What is the name for the feeling you have, when your halfway between disappointed and depressed...... this in between - like most 'in between' things in life remains seemingly nameless and suffering identity crisis......... i'm not that emotionally stricken as to say that 'I' am depressed..... or destroyed....... or unable to cope......... but at the same time...... its more than an obstacle in your path........ more than a stone you've tripped over....... its more than how you feel when you say "aahh its ok"..........
                                                                                 I guess this is where the term 'relative' came in....... to rescue the english language from the ridicule of not being able 2 express it verbally....... but does "relative" really cover the feeling.......... i guess if you say that, does any word express a feeling exactly as it is....... in that case - 'relative' really comes to your rescue....... because maybe no word in english or possibly any other language can actually give you the real feeling.......... only a relative one...........



Image Courtesy - Aihibed Magaña

The Deadliest Sin.....

One of the trickiest and most conniving........ the one thats dressed in the garb of the most harmless...... but in its true potential, threatens to become the most lethal of them all............  The Christian faith defines Sloth as spiritual or moral apathy, neglecting what God has spoken, and being physically and emotionally inactive........... it was considered a Sin as it showed the negligence and failure to use God given gifts or blessings.......... It was associated with the demon - Belphegor who tempted people into a life of languor............. 

                                                                                          On a less religious level of understanding........ you and I can term Sloth as being lazy in an enormously large degree........ Its what keeps us from being an F1 driver..... wildlife biologist.......... documentary film-maker........ and the likes......... its the vice that has entered the being of an unfortunate lot and spreads like a cancer........... Its a curse I do not know why I have been borne with...... Like me, many others wonder what it is like to feel the urge to work......... we wonder what possibly attracts one to toil and sweat........... they are the ones who would assuredly go ahead......... what will be of us..... is anybody's guess.............

Web of Lies

Its so perplexing isn't it........... life and all its mendacity.......... its just like an irresistible game of "Guess What"....... unfortunately most of the time your off the mark!.......... You hardly ever have the good fortune of seeing your dreams or hopes manifest into something physical.......... and when you do its mostly a matter of perception......... but you never know...... its possibly those few fleeting moments..... deceptive as they may be..... that bring in you a rush of life....... a sudden pump of adrenaline that you feel like you could go on and on and on........ I don't really know how it feels like...... I've restricted myself from such 'frivolities'....... but you know at some point it seems that its something you ought to feel......... even if it is pain...........



Image Courtesy - www.amypatacchiola.com

Mutathe Mullakku Manamilla

There has been a long gap, before this post..... the reason for which is that I haven't been around much.... This summer has been particularly eventful and gloriously memorable..... It marks the first ever attempt in my line of vocation..... but also the first time I have ventured above Bombay..... North India - I have heard, seen on television, read about in books but have never ventured into.... the experience has been joyous and enlightening...... there were many things that stood out and many customary actions that were alien to me and I have gone one step closer to understanding..... In the homes of hospitable and friendly strangers and aquaintances there were similarities and differences and it was nice to experience both....... At certain points it was like I've travelled from a far off land altogether...... It was like I adorned the role of Vasco Da Gama or Marco Polo..... there were so many things that drew me closer to their way of life.... the smell in the air, the food they ate, the clothes they wore, the language they spoke were all alluring as if drenched in some intoxicating scent..... An attraction was born quite similar to that of a man towards a woman of bountiful curves..... It was with all these memories and emotions that I returned to a comfortable yet all-too-familiar, home....... Normally these are the experiences that crowd into inumerable books and demystify the reasonsing of the North-South divide and also provide a trove full of anecdotes...... I'm happy and satisfied to keep it in my memory and share this portion to an unknown audience......

                                                                                                          As I go rejoicing in the midst of something so attractively new..... something casually wanders into my head..... a proverb in my mother-tongue, Malayalam..... it goes "Mutathe Mullakku Manamilla"..... literal translation - "The Jasmine in your   own Backyard has no Scent"........... the proverbs essence is that you don't appreciate what you have but you rave about everything else without realising the value of what you have...... it has a universality to it...... more than I can explain...... this proverb is like a reminder to people who tend to forget..... Personally I can say that despite being subject to the choicest delicacies all across the globe I can still never let go of my love for Chorum Sambhar, Meen (red rice and sambhar, fish)...... it helps me understand that even with all the colours that come with autmn and all the pure white snow of winter, my heart will truly tug at the rain drops that transport me home........ there may be a million things to do, enjoy and explore in many lands but I'll still cherish the warm lethargy I feel in my motherland....... and as I write these foreign experiences wrapped up in the cloudy, rain-soaked atmosphere of home...... I can only say that I hope more and more people appreciate such experiences..... but dont forget the Mulla (jasmine) in their own Mutam (backyard).........

Image Courtesy - smilu1984.blogspot.com

"... mysteries of a lifelong quest ..."

As infants, when you enter this world..... this dark, cruel world that is more keen on sinking you into its depth of sin than sacred...... you would have a guiding light - a light that acts as a caregiver, protecter, punisher and mentor until you break away and fly........ its believed that the light is the one that in that span of time has given you the tools for your long flight...... the guiding light can be anything - it could be parents, experiences, friend, a lifelong aquaintance, anything at all............ But what one fails to see is that this light cannot possibly equip you with what you need..... a need to take in the essence of your surrounding and yet the need to retain your individual essence that halts you from merging into it...... a reflex to shun out  all the evils out and about yet an ironic desire to nurse the evils within........ an instinct to protect yourself from emotions that sear you yet ruthlessly succumb to the most painful sear of them all............ for me all of this shall remain mysteries of a lifelong quest - one that may not yield answers but one that gives more of such strange, bewildering and insatiable fragments - that like the rain, drenches but exhilarates........