Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Appropriate Imagery

I’m sitting in the domestic terminal of Chatrapati Shivaji Airport, awaiting my flight back home. You’ve probably heard of the “swine flu” outbreaks, well I’m going home on one of the undeserved breaks its caused my college going life. Well not that I’d be doing much of studying but there are other college going alternatives. I’m sitting here on a single couch sipping Irish coffee reading a book about the “cool, sexy and devout” Middle East (interesting title, ain’t it?). Wearing a loose shirt, slim jeans, latex bands on my wrist, dog tags around my neck and most importantly my spectacles – thus oozing every iota of the don’t give a damn, intellectual and chilled out image that I’ve craved for since school. For me, that’s fulfilment of a dream, not a big one but a significant one. Here on 24th September 2009 at 4:14, I am one step closer to achieving goals. Now at 4:15, I realise, I’m a Loser. You see, when your in school, your not exactly mentally developed (a.k.a – DUMB). You had foolish, adolescentish (childish???//.... GOD FORBID!!) fantasies of how cool you’ll be in college. Guess what – REALITY CHECK – when your in college you spend time thinking how cool/successful you’ll be when your 20+ . The cycle goes on until your 40, that’s when it hits you (and when I say hits, I mean KICK YOU IN THE CROTCH, SMASH YOUR HEAD IN THE WALL HARD) that you spent your prime years fantasising how cool/successful you’ll be and now your nothing but a big, fat (fantasising didn’t give much time for exercise), 40 year old LOSER ( by now you know when I say loser, its an understatement). So I see these teenagers and .....Shudder.... some "not" exactly teenagers preening about in Guccis and Prada trying pitifully hard to look Uber cool/Sophisticated (whatever stereotype they choose to imitate). I wanna jump up, slap their oh-so-fake faces and say “Dude! If you took off those ridiculously expensive sunglasses (we’re indoors by the way) and look in the mirror you’d see a stiff fart loser and guess what everybody here knows that too. So what you showing off your underwear for?”. At this point it would be too clich├ęd and would completely kill if I say something about turning over a new leaf or a new beginning. Hey, im human and that too 19! So all I can honestly say is, I’ll try . But you have to admit, that’s a pretty big step, especially for a 19 year old.

Monday, November 2, 2009

Timeless 'Age Old' Wisdom

You realise your growing up (not literally) when you wonder the things that embarrassed you in the past, don’t make sense anymore. When you can’t recall (read – memory loss!!!) the “nifty” (do i need to say more?!) codes you made up. It’s funny when I was younger (note to people who may misunderstand – im going to turn 19!) a lot of things embarrassed me, as it did for you and still do for many of my peers. Wether it was mom calling me for millisecond updates on how far have I reached on my way to the store that is 10 mins away, or when your dad told you to pack the rest of your sandwich which you’ve barely nibbled as you paid for it – Oh My God…… can they BE more prehistorically “UN”-cool you drone in your up class “American” (yah right!) accent. As you grow older the notions vanish and so does the accent (as if you had it???////) . But now on this 1 hour 50 min flight I find myself answering the same moms multiple calls with almost no qualms (I said “almost”). Putting that extra sandwich you can’t finish from the ‘ridiculously overpriced’ (Aah…. There IS such a thing as ridiculously overpriced eh?? – growth) combo pack voluntarily, without so much as a swift intake of breath by your dad. Its funny what a little time alone and a couple of years can do to your outlook.

Sunday, November 1, 2009

Marketing Monday!

It’s a Monday morning, first one of November and it screams of a new beginning, a new opportunity, to wipe out last months (i.e. yesterdays!) mistakes…….. or so it may seem………. Today is my marketing exam which I do not know “JACKSHIT” about. It is the beginning actually, the beginning of a string of unsuccessful attempts at proving my scholastic capabilities (so much for that dream!). It seems ridiculously hilarious that at one point of life (undoubtedly the most foolish) I wanted to become a doctor. My sister refuses to keep her books in my responsibility, I really doubt wether she’d recommend anything that requires me to be holding a scalpel. So don’t even get me started on anything related to business (marketing, promotion, pricing strategies etc). You probably remember that thing in maths where no matter what your previous numbers are when you multiply something with 0 – you got 0!.... So no matter what big wig strategy you have that the most business oblivious simpleton could figure out, you got me aboard – 0 will follow!

But hopefully this marketing exam would be something I laugh about years later in my mahogany furnished palatial “abode” nibbling on Godivas finest, set against the backdrop of sunset in Spain. But till that fantasy becomes a reality, God Bless anyone who gives a Marketing paper today.