Comfort, my luxury...

Yesterday... out of all things I could have done (ok when i say all - it means this and sleep) I chose to watch Sex and The City 2 (The Movie)... a friend had made me watch the previous movie and not having seen the iconic series, any subtle or not so subtle references were lost on me.... but i don't think I missed much.... It started off as colourful and extravagant as you would think..... fancy apartments, indulgent clothes, privileges galore...... many things happened and these 4 women land in Abu Dhabi..... and at this point it becomes a little difficult for me...... not that up till this point it was easy..... but i managed...... words like luxury and decadence fail to resonate the lifestyle that was portrayed..... amidst all that wealth and exorbitance there was this other sense lurking about..... it was hard not to miss but could easily have been..... it was this sheer obscenity...... maybe im alone on this one..... its not very often that i cringe when i see something that doesn't involve merciless hacking...... but this was one of them...... maybe its because i somewhere believe in balance that such excess was as repulsive as poverty........ it showed you the side of the world created by money..... the side of the world many would kill for..... but i forever more, hope to remain an alien to this side......... for its the simple things in life that bring joy rather than all the diamonds one can buy......... the comfort of being well fed, staying under a good roof and not having to worry too much about a rainy tomorrow is my luxury.....

Where are The Good Old Days?

In an increasingly competitive world, whose demands are not just perfection but its highest degree - i have become lost in oblivion.... not knowing what you want can be a dangerous state.... your helpless and terrified...... its almost like you have nothing..... which in a sense is true..... I always took for granted the time where I didn't have to worry about so many things..... when all that was left to do at the end of the day is finishing your homework or cleaning your room...... but then I was rapt with these dreamy ideas of what being an adult would be like...... how i would be part of a crazy web of endless nights spent wiling away my youth and the wee hours meeting deadlines and earning my bread....

....now when your at that point, it becomes hard to accept that no book or film matched that kind of dramatic fiction..... now it seems like your stuck and good times are but memories...... it seems like I'm craving for those moments in the past that doesn't make me afraid or tired....... when it didn't matter if I couldn't figure something out..... it was ok..... I was just a child...

Just another Tuesday

it probably doesn't come as a great surprise for someone who's read the previous posts, when I say that I'm still clueless...... but i just can't seem to help it.... its almost..... 'Devilish in its innocence' - i don't know how many of you realise who this was originally directed to..... but that's not even half as important as the depth these words carry...... of late..... or rather for the past 2 decades..... i have great joy in reminiscing the pictures and sounds from films.... books..... songs and the biggest spectacle - routine life..... and you come across these very striking phrases or images or feelings that somehow unconsciously register deep in your memory bank......... i particularly remember this scene from a TV show I used to watch as a kid and when i had the chance to see it again a few days ago (that's a good decade later)...... i remembered that time when i was a kid - i remember my house.... the chair i was sitting in..... even that it was dimly lit and sometime in the late afternoon.... and all of these details rush to the surface making it something like my very own Episode of the Madeleine or more suitably - Episode of the Television...... but you must come across such things more often than we think.... like a TV episode..... this wonderful phrase i started off with....... an odd childhood memory...... or even the title of a song..... this one took my fancy the moment i heard it...... called..... Send Me The Pillow That You Dream On...... quite a lovely thing to say...... almost engineered to melt the symbolic human heart to butter...... needless to say, the singer was more than successful..... Now in the presence of such an infinite sphere of such delicate and profound elements.... many that i'm not even close to comprehending..... can you blame me entirely for not wanting to look for something as fearfully restrictive as employment?

Late Night 'Rumbling'

now all of us are human...... we enjoy the good things in life..... we enjoy a great place to go to....... we enjoy a great tune to tap our feet along with....... and arguably, the best of all..... we enjoy a great meal....... there's nothing like a good plate of grub to put a smile on your face..... now some of us like to wine and dine in luxury..... others prefer a cosy, comfy, home cooked delight..... but i don't know if any one truly appreciates the satisfying feeling you get with the best meal of the day -

The Late Night Snack!

Now, mothers across the globe are frowning....... they'll be saying things like "spoil your appetite"...... "your being a glutton"....... "not giving your digestive system a rest"......... while all these may be true....... it doesn't come in the way of the solace, someone gets by reheating the cold pizza....... its late and your up because your upset, you have a deadline, your too happy or you just can't sleep......... now in this time of nocturnal distress - who gives you company? a steaming Maggi noodles.... many a hostel inmates are nodding with me now...... in your anxious 'hours before exam' moment - biting into a crunchy biscuit gives you a much needed break........ when your spending the wee hours discussing everything under the sun with your friends - sharing a huge cheesy bowl of pasta only adds to the timelessness of this moment........ or you just couldn't wait till morning for the simple joy of - bread and jam........

now we all eat reasonably well, some more than others but anyway........ we all pretty much get hot, edible and timely meals........ maybe thats why the Late Nighter is so special...... it breaks away from the monotony of your regular BLD (breakfast lunch dinner)...... it doesn't stick to a carbohydrate/protein/fat count......... and more so - it has an element of surprise..... because at that point...... when you screen the fridge and rummage through the cupboards you never know whether you'll find a bag of chips...... or a culinary masterpiece...........

Image - "Late Night Snack" - John LaGatta

Whoops....

Everybody has got traits that... lets just say... they'd like to polish over....... its something that you almost have no control over...... its probably the ever successful capacity to always put your foot (and everyone elses) in your mouth.......... maybe its that you always get the punchline half an hour later or worse - after the last person stops laughing........ or maybe its just impulsive childishness that rises and sinks at its own convenience........ its caused us many a embarrassing moments...... ones you fear will always crowd your consciousness and be a constant reminder to the oddball you may be.....

..... but as most literary works at this juncture goes - you realise they are just right..... matter of fact, they can even be considered some sort of a quirk...... i mean, not all of them have to be cute and rustic like always smelling the pages of a book before reading it..... or borderline OCD like only eat mints in even numbers!....... truth is, it is these very factors that make us who we are..... and give us an identity beyond our name..........

...while these are the characteristics we would hate to be associated with... its intrinsic to us...... sometimes we so admire the opposing quality that we find it hard to accept that we are not so........ but its time we called a spade, a spade...... i have, embarrassingly enough, on multiple occasions not been as subtle as i would hope to be....... what can i say, unconsciously ill let my fingers glide through my hair and at times be flirtatiously charming.... but then someone comes along and i can't help but foolishly smile so wide - even if they were talking about panda bears being slaughtered!

...blank...

There comes a point in everyone's life where...... we realise that things are not the way we imagined them to be...... despite living through that very reality, day in day out...... we seem mysteriously oblivious to it...... and its the very odd co-incidences that becomes your wake up call....... its a little rough..... like when a semi-successful jingle writer realises that he's not the musician he thought he was....... like a closet beauty queen shot down by one of her most faithful admirers...... like a Ph.D. who is facing the fact, that they aren't changing the world as they thought they would, in an elementary classroom........ its a time for confusion....... a time for pondering......... a time hopefully for coming up with an answer........ the courage to move on or get back up your feet.......... at this point its a daze really...... cant say I like this situation, where I finally fully grasp - what it is to be completely blank...

Lazy and Alone?

After a much awaited and satisfying period of employment..... I find myself in the "in-between jobs" stage.... additionally, I've also found myself experiencing how it would be to live alone....... its a very comfortable and idyllic residential space...... where the only glitch to a perfect home-owners experience is a little water flooding in if it rains too much........ not a huge problem, considering some of the places I've seen and lived in...... but more than anything, its an insight as to what my life would be - if I choose to live alone at any point of time........

.....Although capable of long gruelling hours of work with practically no break in between..... deep within me resides a lazy soul..... who thinks of late mornings..... slow afternoons.... and a relaxed evening that merges seamlessly into the night..... while your alone..... one gets to experience this wonderful transition at your own pace...... but there comes a point where this blessed existence becomes so monotonous that you really feel that your spoiling the spirit of 'Laziness' by being too lazy...... similarly as much as I appreciate the solo living..... its true worth lies in the fact that its a treat you look forward to and not be your way of life itself...... there are many here who probably live alone and find it to be the best....... I agree, for a few days...... its like an old saying in my native language - " if in excess, even nectar is poison".......